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Sunday, July 8, 2012

Part 1: Sexology Of The Female Masturbation

Part 1: Sexology of the female masturbation: Definitions, Uses...

Subject Index

1 - The masturbation: an absolutely normal practice

2 - Myths and taboos

3 - A doctor's opinion

4 - Technical and practical studies on the female population

5 - Masturbation and erotic toys

6 - 10 reasons for practicing masturbation!

Part 2: Female Masturbation Techniques (Coming Soon)

Part 1: Sexology of the female masturbation: Definitions, Uses...

For those (women or men) who wish to know more about masturbation, I compiled several papers, sources of advice, and definitions on the big, still often taboo subject of masturbation, particularly when it is practiced by women.

1 - The masturbation: an absolutely normal practice

Masturbation consists of touching, caressing or rubbing ones own genitals (or those of ones partner) to achieve pleasurable feelings and excitement. The research of Kinsey and of Masters and Johnson showed that it's a natural activity and that it allows the release of sexual tension.

When?

At any age one may masturbate regularly or occasionally. During childhood, girls and boys often accidentally discover masturbation: they touch their genitalia, realize that it can be very pleasant, and thus continue this activity. Some girls get pleasurable feelings by crossing their legs and squeezing their thighs against one another. But it's often in adolescence that one becomes aware of the sexual character of this practice. 

Masturbation is generally a young person's first sexual experience. From the age of 12 or 13, most boys masturbate regularly. They begin earlier than the girls because their drives are more focused on their genitals. Girls are usually not yet conscious of the importance of the clitoris in sexual excitement. By the end of adolescence, approximately 90 % of the boys and 70 % of the girls are masturbating. 

Thus, there are more women than men who have never masturbated when they have their first sexual relations with another person. Most people continue to masturbate when they're adults. For men, masturbation is more regular and leads more often to orgasm. Nevertheless, as they mature to adulthood, this practice seems to decline for men, whereas for women it increases.

Substitute or alternative in the sexual intercourse?

No, women who masturbate aren't necessarily lonely nor have incompetent partners! Although men sometimes don't accept this practice well because they do judge it to be a sign of dissatisfaction. It's nevertheless natural to continue to masturbate even when one has a regular partner and a satisfactory sexual life. Masturbation can be considered as a supplementary activity, and even as a temporary substitute for sexual relations.

One sometimes masturbates when ones partner isn't sexually available (pregnancy, periods, conflict) but masturbation can have special advantages; it brings another type of pleasure and allows a person to enrich her/his sexual life, while getting to know her/his own body better and to master it. On the other hand, if it is perceived as a refusal, if the woman thinks that her partner masturbates because she's not desirable, it would definitely be useful to discuss it together. Without communication, masturbation can be read as a sign of anger, alienation, or dissatisfaction.

A self-abuse?

There's no "abuse", and it's not only for oneself. Masturbation can be practiced in front of ones partner. A lot of people find it very exciting. It's doubtless the best means to learn how the other one prefers to be stimulated. Each can guide the hand of the partner to show him (her) which pressure and which        rhythm he or she prefers. 

Mutual masturbation can be very pleasant. Ones own desire will be increased by the pleasure of the other. One can also do it before or during sexual intercourse: it serves then as prelude, increases the excitement, or allows the couple to perfect the sexual intercourse.

The best road towards the orgasm

A woman almost always has her first orgasm by masturbating. The discovery of this source of pleasure will largely determine her future sexual life. Masturbation is the erotic activity that allows women to reach orgasm most frequently (95 %) and most quickly (within 4 minutes). Masturbation even increases vaginal lubrication and thus can compensate for the vaginal dryness that may hinder women from reaching orgasm as they get older.

2 - Myths and taboos

A still taboo subject

Formerly condemned, masturbation is accepted as a natural practice today. Nevertheless, one still doesn't speak about it freely. 42% of women admit to masturbating, while more than 90% of men do. In fact, the sense of guilt is more important for women: they refrain more from this activity and admit it less easily also. 

During childhood, the repressive attitude of certain parents can engender later a sense of guilt. Furthermore, for women, the fantasies connected to masturbation (old fantasies, going back up to early childhood) are much stronger. They thus feel guiltier in adulthood if they continue to masturbate while they have a well fulfilled sexual life.

The successful ideas

Masturbation isn't dirty, shameful, or dangerous for the health. Nevertheless, "Onanism" was considered for a long time to be a bad habit.

Centuries of miseducation and prejudice helped to make this pleasure into a cause of guilt. The modern translation of the word keeps the negative image alive: to masturbate comes from the association of two Latin words, manus (hand) and stuprare (soil, make dirty). No, masturbation will not make you stutter, won't make you deaf or blind, nor a madman or epileptic. It doesn't cause acne, doesn't make you lose your virginity, nor does it kill either. It CAN be a sign of an emotional problem if it becomes compulsive. 

Men may feel reassured that they don't risk becoming impotent or sterile by masturbating. They don't use up their sperm cells by "wasteful" ejaculations. Certainly, if a man ejaculates several times in a few hours, there'll be fewer sperm in the later ejaculations, but it's only temporary. Testicles make millions of sperm cells every day (those that aren't expelled by ejaculation are decomposed when they get old and then are recycled inside the testicles).

Finally, masturbation doesn't reduce (nor increase) the size of the penis or clitoris! As a matter of fact, masturbation is a normal and beneficial practice for the sexual blooming of each person.

Masturbation is the most spontaneous form of sexuality and the simplest to practice. It allows one to discover one's own body and plays an essential role in adding to sexual satisfaction with a partner or replacing an absent partner. And it can also boost the imagination and be an erotic activity for those without partners.

Next to helping you learn about yourself, masturbation has a very important role in human life. It is a means for women as well as men to relax: "when one has this pleasure, one feels relaxed and calmed until the tension rises again later". Because sex is new to everyone at first, it can feel like you are thrust into the unknown in situations where anyone would naturally be apprehensive, sometimes even anxious. Testing new things by yourself first can help you feel more comfortable with a partner.

Masturbation and pleasure-training

Masturbation can train you to know what your body is capable of in its response to pleasure, in the enrichment of its sensations and its feelings, as well as in the blossoming of your fantasies. It's extremely balancing to discover and to exploit your own possibilities of pleasure. During adolescence, masturbation gives physical pleasure a purpose and a place in the young person's life. At all ages, masturbation functions to compensate for or to replace other sexual games when they're impossible, whether for a moment or permanently. For animals, masturbation also seems to play this role and to be us ed as a method of reassurance: female monkeys use a finger or other object, male monkeys use their hands, elephants use their trunk, wild deer and domestic bulls rub themselves against trees, dogs and cats use their tongues…

Masturbation and freedom of the game

In addition, for human beings, masturbation calms fear and stress, because pleasure has a fundamental role in one's psychic balance. Masturbation also has a playful role, of escapism without danger for oneself or for others : by releasing your fantasy life, by playing with erotic images, by escaping into an unreal world you can level out, release tensions, build up your secret garden where you martial your strength and feed its vitality in order to hold out in a crushing, exhausting society where the perspectives offered are often inferior and empty, where you're submerged by social relations without pleasure, dissatisfied and anonymous. Sometimes masturbation has no role of replacement: sex for you and your partner is good, but one of you feels you are missing out on another type of sexuality, where you don't have to pay attention to anybody else, where you follow your own rhythm and the wanderings of your own imagination.

Masturbation and sexual balance

In a couple, one or the other may also want a higher frequency of orgasms: masturbation is the simplest means to achieve this desire and to dissipate the frustration. And actually, masturbation can also involve the partner, becoming a part of the game for both: to reduce human sexuality to vaginal penetration means neglecting the wealth and variety of the behaviours that can bring human enjoyment. Masturbation offers to the couple a possibility of different sensations, to women for whom this way of reaching orgasm can bring another kind of pleasure; to men, for whom masturbation often brings an intensity of excitement that is not allowed by either the softness of a vagina nor the obligation to hold on for a certain time.

Masturbation and guilt

Some feel guilty about resorting to masturbation, as if they stole something from their significant other: if to be satisfied by masturbation leads you to refuse sex with your partner, naturally that's a problem. But, in a couple, it's not necessary that we do everything together; must all our pleasures be strictly shared? shopping, sports, music, reading? If masturbation isn't an escape, but a search for balance, then you both will be at ease, and can experience your sex life with each other without tension. Whereas frustration due to an insufficient sexuality might cause you to resent your partner, and even wish to turn away from sex with him or her.

A personal choice

As a matter of fact, there's a multitude of ways to live out your sexuality. Masturbation is one: by yourself or in the presence of your partner, frequent or occasional, solitary or mutually shared, it colours the life of one person, is absent in the life of another one, is present in that of the third, but retains its fundamental quality of always being accessible without ever being imposed, something that people can take or leave according to their whim.

3 - A doctor's opinion

Doctor Yves Ferroul, on December 6th, 2000

Most women caress, rub, or press their genitals while in various positions: standing, sitting, or lying down. You can stretch out on the bed, with legs spread or with knees up, or sit down with your back against the head of the bed or against the wall. Certain women like directly touching the clitoris; others prefer an indirect stimulation by caressing the parts of the "mountain of Venus" beside the clitoral shaft. It's often the middle finger which is used. You can caress your clitoris from top to bottom, from side to side, or rub in a circle around it if you're too sensitive.

The best pressure and rhythm vary from one woman to the next. Please begin slowly and gently, and then you can get faster and press harder until you find what is easiest for you and what is the most pleasant. Many women keep the same rhythm all the way to the orgasm; others pause periodically, or vary the speed.

Many women insert a finger or an object into the vagina. To insert the middle finger can both feel good and be useful. It can be a support for the other fingers which are stimulating the neighbouring erogenous zones. Your finger also allows you to use vaginal secretions to lubricate the clitoris and the small lips. Otherwise, please moisten your fingers with some saliva or use a water-based lubricant. Continuous and overly intense stimulation of the clitoris can cause it to slightly ache. If so, shift your caresses to a different area. Stimulating the clitoral hood can work if the clitoris itself becomes irritated by the friction.

The orgasm

When you feel an orgasm approaching, you can press your heels against one another to increase the pressure in the groin. You can also contract then loosen the muscles of the pelvis and the buttocks. Bodily movements and groaning may help some women to more easily reach orgasm, while others

Fantasies play a naturally important role: you can relive a hot scene with your partner, or if that doesn't excite you enough, please imagine what you'd like to do with somebody else! It's only fantasy, remember. You might reach an orgasm in a few minutes but it can sometimes take a quarter of an hour: everything depends on your mood, on your physical state (fatigue, stress), and on your excitement.

When you're at the edge of the orgasm, contract the muscles of the pelvis and buttocks. You can also do "Kegel" exercises by rhythmically contracting the same muscle that can start and stop the flow while urinating.

It is good to pursue this stimulation during the orgasm; it will very likely be more intense and may later enable you to have multiple orgasms.

Any sorts of objects

You can stretch out on your stomach on top of a pillow and rub yourself against it or rub against a pillow placed between your thighs. Stretched out on your back, you can use a sheet or a blanket pulled in a back and forth movement. Some women sit down on the floor and rub themselves against the foot of a chair. Even there, the most important thing is the regularity of the rhythm.

Dildos, vibrators, or other "Sexy Toys" can be very enjoyable. There's a multitude of fun gadgets invented for the pleasure of the woman (alone or with her partner).

With some water

During a bath, soaping the body and the genitals is a good start, but please, don't introduce your fingers into your vagina: the soap could modify the PH of your vaginal flora, and you could even catch candidacies, or cystitis. If you want to directly stimulate the clitoral zone, you may sit down or kneel and use the spray from the showerhead. You may position yourself so that the water from the tub spouts drips or splashes against our clitoris. You can move on to manual stimulation if these methods don't bring you to an orgasm. Certain models of bidets send a small fountain upward. Please, also think of Jacuzzi and "whirlpool" bathtubs which can engender very voluptuous sensations.

Vary the Pleasures

Why not try less intimate places? Even public places? No, it's not a question of playing exhibitionist, but simply of bringing more excitement to the game. You can very well indulge yourself for a few minutes during work, in the public toilet, at an evening party, or even in the plane (don't forget the blanket in that case!).

By looking at yourself in a mirror you can see what you look like when you're excited, and when you reach orgasm!

Please, also think of stimulating the other parts of your body. Massage your breasts, arms, and even your whole body with an oil or a moisturizing cream; this can constitute a good beginning. And what is more, caressing your breasts, nipples, and stomach when you're at the edge of an orgasm can intensify the pleasure.

Please try various positions: while lying on the bed with a pillow under your stomach, reach your hand over your buttocks to touch your genitals; try it standing, or leaning against the wall. Let your imagination express itself.

4 - Technical and practical studies on the female population

The art of the feminine masturbation

Women enjoy giving themselves pleasure. The report of the famous American sex therapist Shere Hite, who, in the 1970s, conducted a survey of women all across the United States, showed this. How they do their masturbation is also something this study tried to learn. Here are some results and testimonies extracted from the "Hite report".

3000 women anonymously answered this comprehensive questionnaire of feminine sexuality (orgasm, sexual intercourse, clitoris, masturbation). 82% declared that they masturbated, and, among them, 95% had no trouble reaching orgasm every time they wanted it. All this, according to the sex therapist, contradicted the usually accepted idea that women are "slow to start", and that they have difficulty in reaching orgasm. Over all, the inquiry allowed six types of masturbation to be distinguished (with some variants).

In the very great majority of the cases (73%), the woman manually excites the clitoral region and/or vulva while lying on her back.
  • "I use my finger to stimulate the clitoris, sometimes inserting another finger into my vagina at the same time. I touch only my genital area when I masturbate";
  • "I masturbate by manipulating my clitoris in a side to side massaging manner, starting gently and increasing in intensity of pressure. I use my finger (one hand). The motion is slightly circular combined with side to side, mainly";
  • "I masturbate with my fingers on my clitoris, and other fingers gently pinching, pulling, and scratching, across the surface of my nipples. Sometimes I rub up and down, sometimes in circles. And my legs are sometimes together, and sometimes apart. It is especially exciting to hold my hand still and get the friction by movement of the body against the stationary finger".
The woman can also lie upon her stomach on the bed (5.5%).
  • "When masturbating, I lie on my stomach with my legs slightly apart, using both hands, the knuckles of the right hand providing the direct pressure to the mons, with the left hand adding more pressure to the right hand. The motion of a moderately rapid front-to-back movement provides the clitoral friction I need";
  • "I masturbate on my stomach with my legs together, pressing on my clitoris with the fingers of both hands (index and middle fingers), one on top of the other. Sometimes I fondle my breasts or buttocks with one hand, or insert my fingers into my vagina, but not usually";
  • "Then I turn onto my stomach. I begin to use a circular motion with two fingers on my clitoris and occasionally an up and down motion with my clitoris between my fingers. With my right hand I check to see if my vagina is wet, and fantasize. I continue to stimulate my clitoris
  • with my left hand and then insert two fingers into my vagina";
  • "I kind of hold the vibrator more or less steady under me as I lie face down, and move my body on and around it".
Certain women (4%) rub themselves on an object - soft or hard - without touching themselves with their hands.
  • "I make a clump in the bedding about the size of a fist (I used to use the head of my poor teddy bear, but since I became too old to sleep with a teddy bear, a wad of the sheets has to suffice) and then lie on my stomach on top of it so that it exerts pressure on my clitoris. I then move my hips in a circular motion until I climax very simple";
  • "I don't masturbate. Well, a little rubbing against the sheets maybe";
  • "Usually I masturbate on the corner of a chair or something similar with a pillow between my legs. I hump up and down with my legs together. I discovered this method by accident as a child of four";
  • "I draw myself up slowly against a bathroom sink, and press my mons against it very hard. The sink is stimulating because it is cold. Sometimes I revolve my legs to press harder, and sometimes 'flap' them to vibrate the vulva";
Others tighten their thighs rhythmically, in a repeated way (3%).
  • "When I masturbate, I sit up in a chair or on the bed, cross my legs right over left at the knees and use the pressure of my inner thighs, exerting all the energy in my body and cantering it in my genitals."
  • "I masturbate by rubbing my thighs together, usually lying down, but it can be done sitting up (in an office, on a bus, etc.). I rub them rhythmically, putting subtle pressure on the clitoris. The tension gradually builds to an orgasm".
They can also massage their genital region with some water (2 %).
  • "I masturbate with shower water only. I aim it at my clitoris, legs spread apart";
  • "I lie in the tub on my back with a stream of very warm water on my vagina, mons, and clitoris. The harder the pressure and hotter the water, the quicker the orgasm";
  • "I remove the head from my shower to allow a steady stream of water to come out. I open the vaginal lips, exposing my clitoris";
Only a few women use only vaginal penetration (1.5%) and more half of these stimulate their clitoral areas first manually.
  • "I put one finger on my clitoris and with the other hand I move a bottle in and out of my vagina (a plastic bottle)";
  • "My husband works a dildo in and out of my vagina while I press a vibrator to my clitoris";
  • "I usually use a back and forth movement in my vagina, or just hold my fingers there for a while".
  • Finally, 11 % of the women having answered the questionnaire combine some of these techniques to end in the orgasm.
  • "I masturbate of many manners. On the back in the bathtub, on my bed, on the divan, on the floor and everything crosses my bosoms, my stomach, my thighs, my buttocks, my vagina and my clitoris there. I like rolling my clitoris between the thumb and the index, a finger in the vagina and playing with my bosoms and with my nipples, which I find very beautiful. So by loving me I let wander my imagination. I also like varying my caresses with a vibrator"
5 - Masturbation and erotic toys

Dildos or godemichés

These objects generally have the shape and size of a male genital organ in erection. Their shape can be more or less realistic, some are smooth and discreet and look nothing like an actual penis; some, like the godemiché (wrinkled 'loaf'), can be very realistic. They come in all sizes. They're either hard (made of plastic or metal), or flexible (of soft latex).

How to use them?

You can press the vibrator firmly against the small lips varying the pressure until you orgasm.
With legs apart, you can hold the length of the vibrator against your genitals to rub yourself with it forward and backward. You can use the vibrator also while sitting or stretched out. You can move the vibrator in circular movements, or squat above it. Use your imagination for other positions and other techniques. In fact, most of women don't use this instrument inside their vagina, but only outside to stimulate the clitoris.

Vibrators

The vibrator is an electrical device which vibrates, massages, and which is thus very effective in stimulating the clitoris and the inside of the vagina. Battery powered vibrators are more noisy but are the most popular models. Certain models can vary the intensity, which allows you to vary the sensations. Others are even hollow and contain a liquid which can be expelled by a piston to "feign the ejaculation".

6 - 10 reasons for practicing masturbation!

Advantages and inconveniences

These sexy toys are very easy to use, and terribly effective! A woman can each an orgasm within 3 minutes. These instruments are very useful if you're tired, if you don't have a lot of time, or if you're anorgasmic. But this kind of masturbation can never replace your hand, or your partner.
The sensations that manual stimulation can offer you are much richer. So, please use both!

1. Masturbation allows us to investigate our body and to discover the sensations, the movements, the caresses which excite us most. We then know best our sexual needs and the way of satisfying them. This knowledge can obviously be shared with our partner.

2. Masturbation is a physical and emotional reassurance. It releases the tensions that arise from sexual impulses, and helps us to sleep. No more need of sleeping pills!

3. It makes us more lucid by teaching us to separate love from sex. Reaching an orgasm obviously does not prove that one is in love!

4. If you're single, your will power may still fail concerning chocolate bars, but by masturbating regularly, you won't tear your hair out, and you won't be tempted to go to bed any more with whoever is handy.

5. It's an occasion to concentrate on your own pleasure, without needing to worry about your partner's pleasure.

6. Masturbation allows you to fight the effects of certain sexual dysfunctions: anorgasmy for women and premature ejaculation for men. After a period of abstinence, it's better if the man masturbates at least one hour before sexual intercourse; it'll help him to delay his ejaculation.

7. The more you masturbate; the more orgasms you can have, with or without your partner. Women who get used to masturbating until they have an orgasm have more chances to reach an orgasm later with their partner.

8. It's good for your health: orgasm increases the blood circulation, fights the effects of stress, and gives you sensational skin. For women, it strengthens and at the same time softens the muscles Kinsey used during love.

9. The report proved it: people who masturbate when young have a more fulfilled, more active sex life, and continue to do so much longer.

10. There's no evil in doing oneself good.

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